Misunderstood
by Strikey-Chan
Summary: This is a story of the voices of the misunderstood. Where the most knocked down turn into the world's finest poets. Today's poet of the day: Sweden
1. Misunderstood

"_My name is Sadik Adnan, and I am not a terrorist."_

* * *

**9-11-2001**

Today at school was scary. All of my friends avoided me.

I hadn't done anything wrong, so why did they desert me?

They pointed at me. They called me so many names.

Of course I fought back. All I wanted was to play some games.

Heracles said my people were screwed. Why did he say that?

We always fight, but today he glared at me, as if he wanted me to get away from him and his cat.

They began staring at me, as if I was an attraction.

If I hadn't known better, it was like they were receiving satisfaction.

I got angry. I wanted them to stop making fun of me.

They punched my face so hard. So now I can't see.

I don't want to go to school tomorrow. They'll make fun of my eye.

And they'll make fun of me even more if I ever start to cry.

My friends changed my name without me knowing.

Osama Bin Laden is what everyone is chanting...

Who is him? And what had he done?

And why the hell is everyone asking if I'm his son?

Sadik Adnan is from Turkey, not Saudi Arabia.

So why is everyone confusing us with the same area?

Is it our language? Or is it our colour?

They began threatening me, and said that they'd start with my mother!

I went in front of the class.

I wanted to speak my peace.

But before I reached the front, I got pulled on as if I was on a leash.

I started wearing a mask to school. My eye wasn't getting any better.

People think I'm scary and they run away from me, saying that I'm a killer.

Yeah, go flee. I don't need any of you.

… I say that, but sometimes I cry in my room because I'm lonely too.

Kiku avoided me today. Heracles didn't even look.

I hope they don't find me in the toilet. I bet they're gonna think I'm some crook.

9/11 was the date. 9.23 was the time.

When almost all Muslims were convicted of some false crime.

Ten years later, and everything's still the same.

Those faces are similar, still saying us all Muslims are to blame.

But I'm still writing on this page.

And nothing is getting any better.

Right now I'm just looking for something to make me as light as a feather.

People say that they are looking for facts,

Then they close their eyes all the same.

But when you close them, you are blind...

And then your mind can be tamed.

… This is a world where civil rights are seen as less important than one's religion.

Where being bullied for what you think is _fine_...

And they don't see me as their brother.

They don't see me as their friend.

But really all I want to do is to just play...

He pushes me onto the floor.

And I'm fighting back the tears, as he shouts.

But is this really the path of your Jesus Christ?

Of your Holy book?

Of any religion whatsover?

If so, then count me out.

* * *

**END**

* * *

**[EDIT AS OF 2 APRIL 2013]**

**Alright.**

**This was originally a oneshot-poem thing, but I decided to lengthen it to multiple chapters of poems. I can say that writing poems is easier for me than writing fanfics (heck, mine are terrible anyway x"D). **

**I remember when I was still ten. I stayed up late at night, since it was the holidays. I was looking at some videos/lectures about my religion, Islam on Youtube. My ten-year-old self was horrified when I scrolled down at the comments. After typing in a comment, I read some other comments and began crying. I got a comment reply from someone, saying something along the lines of:**

**'Honey, dear, I'm sorry. But Islam _is_ a lie. Here, you at this website:"**

**She sent me the link to a... Well, what scarred my mind forever. I don't want to go into detail, but I really think that this torment should all end... For both us and other people. I love you all still. 3**

**You could request characters, maybe? :)**

**That being said, a review, follow, favorite or even just a glance at this page is highly appreciated. Thank you.**

**- Strikey**


	2. My Snow

**My Snow**

* * *

"_They point at me because I'm different. I point at them because they're all the same."_

_-Anya_

* * *

Those words, Those words

_'_Bitch' and 'whore'

I want to run away

I want to slam the door

I want to take a knife

I want to cut my skin

I want to laugh about just how screwed up my life has been.

I lean to the toilet,

I throw up to be thin.

And even with that, they still won't let me grin.

I cut and cut and cut some more

Screaming in pain, with all my blood on the floor

People call me scary,

People cower from my face

But they haven't even tried to be in my place.

I don't want to blame them;

But even so I'm in depression.

My brother has to go through a therapy session...

Everything's done for me, my life's fading by

I'll get raped by my other brother

And after that I'll start to cry...

My blood will drip on the floor,

And I'll scream in pain.

And I can't eat because that means more weight to gain.

I think about my life as I sit down on the chair

And I still remember when my brother used to kindly braid my hair.

When did it happen?

Just when did it change?

They point at me with fingers;

Claiming that Anya's the one to blame

For all the lost land

And the wars that they've shout

Please leave me alone...

I just want to get out.

Someday I'll cut it all off,

My soul one day broken.

And I won't tell anyone

My words won't be spoken.

I'll take the rope

I'll hang myself in the dark.

I'll struggle and struggle until there's no beating of a heart.

They'll fall to the ground.

When they hear the words 'She's dead'

And my brother will cry as he sleeps on my bed.

I'll be gone,

And I'll be done.

Just because of some people

Who were just making fun.

I'll be buried on a Friday,

And people will be crying

All because of a Russian girl who simply stopped trying.

So before you judge someone on their weight or their clothes...

Their face, their talk, their hair, or their nose...

Please take a moment to realize and see

That everyone is not always who they seem to be.

They used to shout,

Flinch at the sound of my name.

They point at me because I'm different.

I point at them because they're all the same.

I died not happy;

I died feeling depressed.

I died with the risk that I was never going to rest.

You read this letter

You thought that I didn't matter at all.

But I'm gone from this world;

So are you satisfied now?

* * *

**END**

* * *

**Oh, Anya. -hugs-**

**I feel sad now. :(  
**

**- Strikey**


	3. Dear Diary

_Dear Diary,_

_Today was a long day at school and I haven't really eaten anything yet today but..._

_I guess that's good._

_I just wanted to... Write something that's quick before I went to bed._

_So here goes..._

* * *

**Dear Diary**

* * *

I'm fourteen and I always feel so nervous

Tell me why that everyone is always so perfect?

While I look so worthless,

And they look so happy,

While lately for me my mood has been so crappy.

And I have come to believe of all the things that I'm seeing

On magazines and MTV

Of every single perfect being

Of all the girls with perfect bodies and such, amazing skin

Oh, how I would kill to live the life that they are in...

I've been trying to lose weight over the last couple weeks,

Throwing up in the toilet on the rare times that I eat.

But that isn't enough.

I still need to do much more.

To get this guy to notice me,

And you wonder 'what for'?

Daniel now doesn't like me.

Doesn't smile at me in class

He likes the music girl, you see.

Sometimes I'm left here,

Just crying and thinking to myself;

Oh God,

Is this worth it

Or do I need some help...?

I've been used by guys,

I've been hurt by girls.

I've been hit by Louise;

And cursed by the world...

But I keep losing weight, attempting to be perfect

…. I'm waiting for somebody to tell me that I'm worth it.

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_This will be... One of the last entries I'll be making for a while, I think._

_I think that... It's time things... Change. And time when I can be happy. So... I'm going... To turn over a new leaf._

_Thank you for always being there for me, after each vomiting period I went through. Thank you for helping me._

… _And thank you for listening._

* * *

This road to recovery's honestly been a bitch.

It took of all my will to finally make my switch.

I'm seventeen years of age,

But my weight says I'm ten

And I feel like in my life

I have not one friend.

I've been laughing too much,

My trust is all gone

It has gotten to the point where I'm as frail as a frawn.

My little sister left home,

And my Grandpa just died

Daniel doesn't care,

And I've cried like a tide.

Call it a mental illness, my wish is to be completely perfect.

I remember telling them when all I wanted to be is 'worth it'.

My mom was worried when I didn't have the strength to stand,

My goddamn counceler seems to be my only helping hand.

Life has me wondering,

"Why the fuck am I even here?"

"Whatever happened to those people I once held near?"

I'm sick of people always telling me what to do.

For real, I just want something that I can relate to.

Does the chapter ends here?

That's all I want to know.

My arrogance never let me think that I'd be fully alone

In my room, no one's there.

I cry myself to sleep...

I wish that I could love, and live and just leave.

_Breathe_!

I made it through another long day.

Finding fear in the words that I thought I'd never say.

How can I match up to what the world says is 'beautiful'?

I look into the mirror,

And all it screams is 'You're unsuitable'

Tell me that I'm beautiful.

Really, that's all I want to hear...

Someone let me cry and make all the pain disappear

It's an illness, I know I should treat myself better,

I just want someone to understand me down through the letter.

But mark these words -

I'll be stronger than I ever was.

I'll be happy with myself when I never was.

I need to move on,

Past this diary I've always kept...

And all the pages that hold all the tears that I've wept.

* * *

Maria hummed to herself as she walked around her house. Her house was huge. She could exercise around her house if she wanted to. She stroked her pet bird on her shoulder before giving it a kiss; to which her husband then called her.

"Maria!"

"Yeah?" Said the albino woman as she went to where her husband's voice was coming from. To her surprise, she found her partner squatting and squinting at the house's storeroom. "Dan, what the heck are you doing?" Maria asked as she quickly walked to his side.

"I'm thinking of doing some spring cleaning."

"Dude. It's Fall." She replied dryly.

"It's never to late to clean though, right?"

Maria rolled her eyes. She turned her heel. "Cleaning's not awesome. If you're going to do it, do it by yourself -"

Her husband pulled her arm. She flinched at the grip – she hadn't noticed how strong he had gotten over the years.

"That's not how a lady acts," Daniel teased. "And if I throw everything out by random, you'd get pissed if I threw out things you liked."

Maria huffed. "Trust me," she said. "There is nothing to like about the things I throw away."

Daniel pulled her suddenly; right into his arms. She was not expecting it. A massive tomato-murder on her face, she squirmed and squirmed in her husband's grip.

"Let me go, you bastard!"

"Come on, Ria..."

Maria cringed. She didn't like that cheesy nickname.

The brunette moved his head closer with Maria's – she could feel his breath on her ear now. She trembled helplessly as Daniel's lips enclosed around the lobe of her ear; the moment she felt the moisture of a tongue, she lashed out at her husband.

He fell onto the floor quite painfully. The brunette looked at Maria in amusement.

"Fine! I'll clean the goddamn store with you!" The albino said, flustered. "But if you dare do that ear-licking thing ever _again_, I'll – I'll..."

"You'll what?" He said while laughing.

"Shut up!" Maria screeched as she barged into the store room.

"You get too worked up. You act as if I won't love you anymore if you don't obey to my commands." Dan commented while wrapping his arms around Maria from behind.

"Get off. You said you wanted to clean, not romancing!" The albino exclaimed annoyedly and pushed her husband onto the floor.

He landed with a loud thud. Daniel rubbed his scalp. Maria was certainly stronger than her looks. He felt something on his head, something hard. Getting up, the brunette took the object from underneath his head and peered at it.

"The hell...?"

"What's that you're holding?" Maria asked.

Daniel stood up and dusted off the dirt off his clothing. He glanced at the book once more. "It's... A notebook, it would seem..."

Maria's breath stopped short.

"May I hold it?"

Daniel looked at her. "Yeah, sure," he said while passing her the book. "Wonder how that got in here. It's a really pretty book, too."

Maria felt her husband's words draining out from her head as she took it from him. The blue cover with an inner turqoise surface stared back at her. She flipped through the pages that were yellow with age. The familiar smell of the diary brought her back.

"Maria?" Daniel asked suddenly. "What's wrong...?"

She couldn't speak. All she could do was look at the page. She widened her eyes before letting out tears that she had wanted to let go for so long.

Daniel comforted her. "Hey," he said softly. "Why're you crying -"

Maria didn't want to hear anymore. She wrapped her arms around her husband. She cried. And cried, and cried. Daniel, confused, could simply pat her head and say comforting words like 'Hush, it's okay' or 'Hush, you can tell me about it'. Maria wiped the tears before letting Dan give her a kiss just under her left eye. Another tear went – this time he wiped it for her.

"Don't cry." Daniel smiled softly as he looked into Maria's pink eyes. "Ria looks ugly when she's crying."

Tears were on the brim again. Maria punched her husband; but it was a weak punch, unlike all her other strong attacks before. The brunette laughed and hugged Maria once more, kissing her on the cheek.

Maria welcomed the embrace, but still sent him a weak punch.

"Shut up..."

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_I was so awesome today._

_When I'm grown up, I'm sure I would have already gotten rid of you. But I still gotta wonder what's my grown-up-self like, y'know?_

_That's why, if anyone in the future can read this, tell someone awesome named Maria Beilschmidt that she made it, that she's awesome, and that I hope she's doing good._

_Maybe things aren't really in tip-top shape right now, but I hope that you're having a nice life, other me._

* * *

I'm twenty-three and I just ran across my old diary.

I opened it up;

I really don't know what inspired me

To do this, but I did

And I was instantly in tears

To think about how I was lost

During those young years.

And the guy that I mentioned back,

When I was seventeen -

He's my husband now;

I guess that I'm living the dream.

We've got a huge house, a nice car

And a good life,

But my arms are still scarred

From using my own knife.

But he accepts me who I am,

And now he knows about my past.

And after all that,

He still says we're still going to last.

And I love him,

I love him, I love him, with all my heart

I honestly couldn't take it if we got pulled apart.

Louise too returned;

Said sorry she went off track

But as I was crying

I was just glad she came back.

If I could say one thing to me,

At age fourteen,

It would be

'You'll find a guy who will treat you like a queen.'

So don't be afraid to be arrogant,

Raise your chin up high.

It gets better as it is,

So don't worry about your size.

Never think that you're alone,

Because beauty is in those faces who cry.

Who find a way to be happy

Even after a loved one dies.

Who can still feel the Sun

When the sky is streaked with clouds.

And who aren't afraid to say their favorite words out loud.

So please don't be shy.

Never think, in your life,

That being real is unsuitable.

A fake rose may look good, but will never smell beautiful.

* * *

**END**

* * *

**Requested by TwinsOnDaHaus.**

**So... On a personal note... **

**Our school is having this three-day 'Home Based Learning' where we basically do learning via computer and stuff. Our teachers send us assignments each day, blah blah blah, things like that.**

**Yesterday was the first day. I didn't do a _single_ assignment. At all. I thought I could finish both the first day assignments and second day assignments at the same day, which is today. But guess what. Just as I finished writing the 'TO BE CONTINUED' here, my mom passes me the phone and my Science teacher begins talking to me about how she checked and she didn't see a single assignment being done from me. I was just 'Oh shit shit shit shit' of course. First time I've been scolded by a teacher via phone ever in my life. xD**

**Ah, I love Mrs Chang anyways. I didn't do those assignments because I was up all night playing OSU! And finishing a chapter of a fanfic of mine... (Our Generation) So okay, so maybe I do regret a little doing that. ._.**

**To And I'm Javert, I'll be doing Sweden next, if I can 8D**

**This is a different style, huh... I can't help it, I love Maria after all xD I based her story off the songs 'Dear Diary' and 'Dear Diary Part Two' and 'Beauty' by MikelWJ. You're awesome.**

**Thank you for all your awesome reviews. You're awesome too. Feel free to request!**

**And now, if you'll excuse me, this twelve-year-old lady really has to get going on her homework. -.-"  
**

**- Strikey**


	4. Pride

**Pride**

_**"Only that I'm the only one who was always taking one step forward, a****nd always two steps back."**_

_****__-_Sweden

* * *

I remember loving a man.

I remember how he smiled as he ran.

He took my only heart

And right in front of me, he dared to rip it apart.

I know he didn't mean to,

And the fault is mine to blame

But guilt and sorrow remains in me all the same.

But now I understand,

Why he ran away

Now I understand why he didn't stay

He was afraid to love,

Afraid to take a chance

He was afraid to leave and make another stance.

He was afraid to make his mark

On the society's wall

He was afraid to take a leap

Afraid that he could fall

He would have rather stayed inside a rotting jail

He'd rather stay with them,

And let me pay bail.

He made his mind,

Stayed with society

I have no say after he became free.

So now as I sit outside this never-ending dream

I linger like a nightmare

I'm making people scream.

I think it's just a phase

I think I'll get over it soon

But they think it' a disease

Just like the werewolf and the moon.

But deep down in my heart, I know it isn't so

Because I have to be strong,

I can't let it show.

That one man who threw me in a bin

Sorry to disappoint, but I'll never give in.

What's the point of hurting me?

Just so I can feel bad?

So that I can understand what it's like to be sad?

I already know how it feels

We're just like shoes on a rack

Only that I'm the only one who was always taking one step forward,

And always two steps back.

Is our world really that cramped?

That we like the same sex

Who really gives a damn?

Who cares if I'm gay!

That's me and my sexuality

Because in my world, I take it as a victory

That I can make a choice and stand from the rest

I'm still an individual and I still try my best.

Those at school may laugh at me and call me names.

It doesn't really matter,

After all, it's just their simple game.

Later on in life they'll see...

That the reason I was different,

Was because it was me

So go on, go on!

Raise your heads chin high

But remember these words,

Make sure you remember 'till you die.

Remember that I was strong

Remember that I managed to pull through

And remember that if I can do it,

Then so can you.

* * *

**END**

**Here's your request, And I'm Javert. C:**

**To Guest (anonymous): Really? I seriously didn't know that! O.O I took that quote from a video I watched, not from a movie. I better go credit it, just in case xD Thanks for telling me!**

**I'm making a new 'Hetalia Poem Fic' and it's titled 'EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HETALIA'. Go check it out if you have time. C:**

**Request if you'd like. Good day~**


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